Tattoos

So here it is: J already got a tattoo, but she hasn't said anything about it here yet. She'll introduce it when she feels fit, so keep your panties on.



I on the other hand am only in the planning stages. But what a fucking plan! Here's what I have so far:

More to come soon bitches.

UPDATE: 5^th draft. 

Shit that doesn't matter.

In my last post I talked about girls with boyfriends. I'm going to talk about it in this one too.

I recently stumbled across this little gem.

Lesson 1:
        Don't talk about your fucking partner unless they're in the room! It just doesn't matter that much.

Lesson 2:
        If she talks about her boyfriend but won't fuck you, see this post. Get rid of her after you break her.

Lesson 3:
        If she talks about her boyfriend and will still fuck you, you have an easy out when you're done with her; "I just started thinking about how your boyfriend would feel if he found out, and I don't feel right doing this." This situation is good because it still leaves most of the blame on her and you're probably acquitted of all culpability.

Lesson 4:
        If she doesn't talk about her boyfriend and fucks you even though she has one, you have nothing for which to feel guilty. If anyone asks, your response is along the lines of, "She never said anything, and how was I to know?" You're completely innocent of any wrongdoing (even if you knew she had a boyfriend from outside sources, this is still the best tactic to take). Obviously this is ideal for you.

On the other hand, while I don't give a fuck about your boyfriend when contemplating casual sex, when expressing genuine attraction toward someone, it is nice to know up front that they're otherwise occupied with someone else; that way you don't have a lot of wasted effort, expense or expectations!

Check back next week for a post on "The Three Es!"

r.

So, you want to date my friend?

j: He's really funny and attractive but he wears cargo shorts, tennis shoes and Star Wars t-shirts.

r: He also wears jorts which were manufactured as such, and he's a Christian.

j: So no sex before marriage?

r: Right.

j: So how's that working out for him?

r: Well, he's not getting any pussy if that's what you're asking.

j: Maybe that's why he wears cargo pants and tennis shoes: he's never tried to get laid.

r: Sex is like driving, even though I don't really understand the parallel.

j: I do. You can't really do anything without either of them.

I guess religion really does poison everything, Mr. Hitchens.

watch this

I finally contribute! To give a brief introduction to myself, I'm a successful 22 year old female who is about 75% ruled by her compulsions, urges and vices. The 25% of control I have goes to school and work. It's a hard life. I love sex, Hispanic men, intoxication and good food. Nice to meet you blogging world.

Q. What am I doing this weekend?

A. Driving my happy ass to Cocoa Beach, putting on my floppy hat, and spending the weekend laying by the shore alone and watching glistening barely-legal boys surf in the Atlantic. I'm about 20 years ahead of my time with this dirty little secret, but MY GOODNESS how I would love to rob a cradle. Really, I'm just ready to end this rut... so young or old, I'll take anything I can spot on the beach behind my mirrored lenses.



I will keep you abreast (hurf durf) of my successes and failures.

J.



EDIT: As a response to R's last post, it's the good guy act. R has innocence written all over his face, even when his actions and words contradict. He can't seem to wipe the virgin stamp off his forehead, even though he took care of that a while ago. Attractive but non-threatening, letting girls get away with quite a bit. Girls EXPECT you to not try to close, thats why you're their bored scratching post they can go play with when their owners aren't petting them. Take THAT, Oprah. Paz.

She's gonna leave you without a smile.

Give me ten minutes alone with your girlfriend and I'll have her number in my pocket when I leave the bar. Three days later I'll call her and take her out to lunch, but she won't tell you she's going to lunch with a guy she just met in a bar and gave her number to. Then we'll "hang out" a couple times, make a couple excuses, and she'll probably stay the night because she's "too drunk." At this point, she's using me to end things with you.

But guess what? I'm not going to steal some other guy's girl - that would make me a homewrecker, so instead, I'll have her flirt with the possibility of leaving you. When she's convinced herself she wants to leave you for me, I won't let her (remember, that would make me the bad guy) and instead force her to get back together with you. Now you won't trust her anymore, and she gets a complex, and I get to watch.

Examples: The Veteran, The Fawn, and the latest conquest.

r.