So, you want to date my friend?

j: He's really funny and attractive but he wears cargo shorts, tennis shoes and Star Wars t-shirts.

r: He also wears jorts which were manufactured as such, and he's a Christian.

j: So no sex before marriage?

r: Right.

j: So how's that working out for him?

r: Well, he's not getting any pussy if that's what you're asking.

j: Maybe that's why he wears cargo pants and tennis shoes: he's never tried to get laid.

r: Sex is like driving, even though I don't really understand the parallel.

j: I do. You can't really do anything without either of them.

I guess religion really does poison everything, Mr. Hitchens.